Tag: life coach

Sailboat silhouette on the water at sunset, framed by palm leaves
Uncategorized

Overwhelmed? Join the Club. But Here’s the Good News…

rustadmitch

Overwhelmed? Join the club.

Look around (I mean actually look, not doom-scroll) — everything’s optimized to make you feel behind, or less than someone else. Everyone’s highlight reel is on 24/7 blast, and somehow we’re all quietly comparing our Tuesday to someone else’s best day ever. No wonder white-knuckling feels like the default setting now. It basically is.

Then life throws you a real knock — a loss, a layoff, a health crisis, a relationship that didn’t make it — and you are forced to step back from the race, and (hopefully) something wonderful happens. You get a dose of perspective, fast. A health issue hits, and suddenly it’s a lot easier to let go of fussing over the nonessentials. You lose someone or something, and suddenly gratitude for what you still have isn’t some abstract idea — it’s right there, obvious. All that noise you were carrying? Gone, fast. Turns out the stuff you were gripping so hard doesn’t really matter, and the stuff that actually does finally gets loud enough to hear.

That’s a real opening, if you decide to let it be.

But no matter what’s currently happening, it’s always liberating to ask yourself a few big questions: What am I actually holding onto that’s limiting me, and why? Which of these “shoulds” did I even choose for myself? What old negative box am I still living in purely out of habit? Answer those honestly, and something shifts. The grip loosens.

And this is where it gets fun — because this is when you get a big green light to actually use your imagination. If you were totally free — no boxes, no shoulds, no old rules — what would your ideal day actually look like? Not someday. Today. Start adding elements of that in, right now. Why not, right? What is there to wait for?

Ask for what you want. Offer something real in return. Just decide to be happy for an hour and see what happens. What have you got to lose?

Here’s something I’ve found to be true: succeeding and thriving can expand simply by deciding to be happier, right now, as you are.

Your energy shifts. You end up with a kind of aura that’s genuinely appealing to be around — people feel it, even if they couldn’t tell you why. Turns out that’s not a coincidence.

We’re all trying to figure this out. Every single one of us, under the same impossible expectations. But the knocks? They might just be the shortcut.

Now available: ‘Get Out of Your Own Way — A System for Living’. Right here. Where you are. Listen to part one — as a gift to get fully started — or get all 5 sessions (and bonus session and workbook) at GOYOW. Enjoy!

Uncategorized

In A Crisis, Super-Charge Your Self-Image

rustadmitch

For many people, life has suddenly felt like it’s turned completely upside down. Nothing makes sense. Long-held foundations seem to be in peril, and the future is a big giant question mark. Who can even think of planning for the future when getting through today can seem too formidable? But here we are, life moves on, what choice is there but to deal directly with it? Much of that has to do with our self-image, HOW we see ourselves in the world, and what we think we’re capable of. THAT is where personal power resides, out of reach of the latest headlines, economic or world crisis. Someone said recently they want to be the type who laughs in the face of adversity, that sounds good to me, too. So let’s get to work.

Let’s look at the power of your self-image; how you see yourself when you wake up, take care of daily tasks, interact at work and home, and especially when you’re all alone, with your thoughts. Do you feel powerful, whole, worthy, and equal? Or are you trapped in one version of life, and how you believe you can or should live it. I call this a box, it’s not a physical box, obviously, but a mental one. It’s a construct, usually unconscious, built around unsaid rules, old beliefs, approval seeking, and survival. The box says, ‘Here’s what you have to do to survive and stay safe,’ but my question is, is that box still serving you today? Are those rules still true? What we believed as a child can be very, very different from what we know as we grow older and experience more of life. What boxes are you living in, and restricted by, in life today? How open are you to confronting that idea and replacing old self concepts that no longer serve you?

Few things are more exciting than gently questioning something about yourself that you were certain was true, but under examination, realizing it’s just a self-imposed box. That isn’t a hard fact, but just a habit. Maybe it’s a habit you’d like to break, and you’d be happier, freer, lighter, and easier for it. So, pick an area you’re stressed about or frustrated by, and examine yourself around that area. Are you allowing yourself to fully function, speak up, express yourself and ask for what you want? 

You might want to take it even further: Do you think u can’t enjoy moments of happiness until the world gets ‘fixed’ and the right party is in charge? Or you can’t feel good now, because the right partner hasn’t shown up? Or until your bank account has a certain balance, you can’t feel truly abundant? Ask, write down your boxes, and have fun exploring what you find, and see if you’d live more effectively without them. 

We can’t change the world or what’s happening overnight, but super-charging your self-image to expand how peaceful, powerful, and fulfilled you are today IS not only possible, you owe it to yourself. That includes your physical self-image, too — it’s one thing you can do, and no one can stop you from making that decision. And here’s the bonus: this crazy world will be better for it.

—–

Now available: ‘Get Out of Your Own Way — A System for Living’. Right here. Where you are. Listen to part one — as a gift to get fully started — or get all 5 sessions (and bonus session and workbook) at GOYOW. Enjoy!

Uncategorized

Little Delights Matter

rustadmitch

What are your little delights in life? This may sound impractical, but identifying and cultivating them can have a profound impact on your life. Given the immense challenges of the last year or so, with routines and normalcy obliterated, I’ve come to realize the importance of paying attention to what I call in my coaching sessions ‘little delights.’ The things that, no matter what’s going on out there, can bring you back to a sense of personal joy and happiness.

A seemingly simple, meaningless little delight had the power to shift my energy, my outlook on life.

I had a personal revelation about this recently. One of my favorite personal ‘little delights’ is starting the day, slowly, with a big iced coffee in a cool-looking tumbler, usually propped up on pillows in my bed, with some music playing. Over the years, I’ve found this is just my thing: My creativity flows freely, for whatever writing projects — a new script or freelance writing project, personal aha’s or new ideas for my coaching practice. This is when I most easily get ‘out of the box’ and I have access to an overall feeling of abundance and well-being. Having been away from NYC for extended periods during Covid, I found that when I returned recently, I didn’t have my usual fancy tumbler. So I drank my iced coffee out of a plastic sippy cup, out of laziness, thinking it was not a big deal. Much more important stuff going on, right? Every morning for a few weeks. I felt less joyful and optimistic. Sure, that could just be my Twitter feed talking, but I realize now it was not just the toxic news out there. I had taken away one of my little delights, and it ended up reverberated throughout the rest of my day. My energy/mojo felt off. I’d look at the sappy cup with disdain but heard myself think, oh, what does it matter? It’s just coffee.

But that’s not true, not at all. Little delights matter. So I put ‘new coffee tumbler’ on my To Do list —which for me means it will actually get done — and got a brand new, delightful cup. Almost immediately, I felt more energetic and optimistic. A seemingly simple, meaningless little delight had the power to shift my energy, my outlook on life. Crazy, but for me, true.

So take a moment today and ask yourself what little delights have you lost touch with (because of Covid or any other reason)? Make a list of your top 5 things that just make you happy, regardless of what’s going on. Then, simply make sure you’re including those in your daily routine. Sprinkle them into your routine. Maybe you’ll be happier for a few minutes, or hours, or longer? isn’t that what it’s all about?

Now available: ‘Get Out of Your Own Way — A System for Living’. Right here. Where you are. Listen to part one — as a gift to get fully started — or get all 5 sessions (and bonus session and workbook) at GOYOW. Enjoy!